The man who would be America’s Champion, Michael Avenatti, seems to know exactly which rocks to turn over in his unceasing quest to expose the bugs, slugs, and ughs on Team Trump, the most incompetent and criminal enterprise ever to exist in United States government.
He has help, of course — Trump keeps picking morons to represent him.
With an attorney like Michael Cohen, Trump was bound to see his iniquities come back to haunt him — Cohen hasn’t even existed on the same plane as “accountability” for so many years, he’s forgotten how to even hide his tracks. And Trump’s newest attorney, Rudy Giuliani, is impossibly even worse. In fact, Rudy accidentally exposes things he’s not even being questioned about on a pretty regular basis, to the point that there’s almost a standing joke among pundits now: “I heard he got a ticket for jaywalking, but his lawyer Rudy pleaded it down to first-degree murder.”
The problem is, Rudy — totally like Trump — just says whatever comes into his walnut brain in any given passing moment.
While Giuliani was at a conference in Tel Aviv, Israel last week, in the middle of making a fool of himself talking about North Korea, he made a declarative statement about the woman who, along with Avenatti, has become his client’s arch-enemy: Adult film star Stormy Daniels, one of the most successful directors in the history of X- (and stronger) rated movies.
“I don’t even think there is the slightest suspicion that it’s true. Excuse me, but when you look at Stormy Daniels? I’m sorry I don’t respect a porn star the way I respect a career woman, or a woman of substance, or a woman who has great respect for herself … [T]he business you are in entitles you to no degree of giving your credibility any weight.”
Avenatti is (rightly) fiercely defensive of his client’s profession — the largest porn website on the internet, Pornhub, gets nearly 80 million hits every single day, so, um… somebody likes Stormy’s line of work. There’s nothing illegitimate about doing a job that a confessed 70 percent or more of Americans consume.
In fact, he thought maybe Trump should justify what his lawyer had said, given his own habits of seeking out not just porn stars but centerfolds as well, in addition to being married to a woman who got her modeling start by posing nude:
“You know, when Donald Trump was trying to get in the pants of my client, he didn’t tell my client that he disrespected her, or that she wasn’t credible or she wasn’t intelligent.”
But that got Avenatti thinking, and soon he had a plan for Rudy:
I want to test Mr. Giuliani’s claims of being adamantly against pornography and having no use for adult film stars. If anyone can provide me with any evidence of him voluntarily viewing pornography, I will protect you as a source and publish it. Let’s PROVE the hypocrisy. #Basta
— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) June 9, 2018
Now it looks like somebody might have thrown Michael a bone, so to speak. In a cryptic follow-up tweet, Avenatti intimated that he may have just the proof he was looking for to undercut Rudy’s disrespectful, unnecessary, and frankly sexist attack on his client:
The sheer power of the Internet and Twitter never ceases to amaze me…
— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) June 10, 2018
If I’ve learned anything from the last few months of watching Trump’s whole unfaithful past unfold, it’s to never doubt Michael Avenatti, and that means for better or worse, we’re all about to find out what kind of porn Rudy watches. Is it girl-on-girl? MILF porn? Is he a dwarf porn man? Kellyanne lookalikes? The world may not be ready to find out.
Featured image via New Century Times Gallery